Gabriella Alziari

Confusion

Confusion

seeping into the corners of my mind,

causing blindness.

 

I’ve never known such a sorry state as this,

where my identity is stripped like my own skin.

But then you never knew this part of me,

my secret heart, my provocative writing.

 

I fold slowly back into myself,

a softened balloon,

unused and unblooming.

I drag my limbs,

a wounded animal retreating into my cave,

leaving dirt paths behind me.

 

You shed the embryo of us

like a shadow.

It fell away immediately.

Crouched on the floor, holding the remnants,

I embrace you with a vengeance, for love is like cradling an enemy,

someone other than yourself.

 

Now there is confusion.

 

Chaos, like when salt meets pepper.

I am sifting through the grains, but not finding a clear path.

I am grabbing fistfuls, but coming up

empty-handed.